Hey Bloggers..
This month, not a good month. Ever since February 15th.. It was hard for me to think straight, do my work and not cry. Life is hard, I know.
I've been feeling so insecure lately. Mostly because of being abandoned by the ones you care most. Probably to him, he didn't exactly abandon me. But it sure felt like it. I've been trying to let go and just try to be happy n focus on the little things. It's hard though. Especially since I'm reminded by the sad truth daily.
I mastered fake smiling. I pretend that everything is alright and the world is just right when in reality,
I'm hurting. I try to not cry, not to show how I really feel coz I don't want people to think I'm just another selfish bitch who wants everything to go her way.
I just want someone to be there for me. I wanna talk to that person but I never had the guts to. It came up a couple of times but still, nothing is solved.
I can't exactly say that the cause is my classmate. She's a really nice, likeable person. I can't blame her for that. Should I just blame myself? Am I just overreacting?
I don't want to be hurt again. It's too much. But I don't want to ruin the friendship. It's too precious and dear to me to let go.
Sometimes I feel stupid for dying over a guy I'm not even head-over-heels for..
I may not be the most likeable person, I get it. That's basically why I need him, as my friend, to be there for me. I can't always count on crying or cutting. I'm tired of saying "I'm okay". I'm not!
I need a hero. For real.
